Sunday, January 29, 2012

MRI Technicalities

MRI Technicalities
Saturday, January 21, 2012
3:01 PM

Who offended / What they did:
Last month I was scheduled for an MRI.  The technician failed to make me feel safe.  He didn't provide details before starting. He didn't ask if I had claustrophobia. Best case: The equipment he was responsible for failed and he didn't hear me trying to communicate for several minutes.  Worst case: He was ignoring me or left me unattended. 
Affected Feelings:
I felt abandoned, afraid and began to panic.   
My Response:
I was angry at him.  I must still be angry since I am still judging him and condemning him when I speak of him.  I have judged him as insensitive and not good at his job.  He should be aware of the high percentage of people who struggle with being enclosed in an MRI…according to the internet 20-25% of people are unable to complete the MRI due to claustrophobia. 
My Heart/Desire:
To have felt safe enough to complete the MRI.
ROADBLOCKS to forgiveness:
The idea that by forgiving him I have to go back and trust him to do this again.  NOT true.  There are many options available to me.
I can be thankful that I do have other options for the MRI.  There are other facilities and I can request an open MRI so it will be less claustrophobic.  I am Very Thankful he did finally hear me and I didn't have to wait the full 45 minutes of the scan for him to come back. 
Choose to Forgive:
Father, I do choose to forgive this technician.  In your word, you promise to complete the good work that you have begun in me. (Phil 1:6)  I trust you to do the supernatural work of forgiveness in my heart.  I cannot do this on my own.  Thank you Father for being God, for reigning in my heart.  I ask that you would heal my heart and restore my trust in the next technician. 
Forgive Me: 
Father, forgive me for holding onto my anger.  It was righteous anger for about 1 minute but almost immediately it became judgment.  I didn't even tell him that he had failed to hear me for at least 3-4 minutes.  I should have provided him that feedback.  I have held him in judgment now for nearly a month.  You are the only one who knows all there is to know and can judge without sin.  He is accountable only to you. 
I choose to not hold him accountable for my anxiety during the MRI.  I entrust him to you, Lord.  I trust that you will provide him with the revelation that he needs so he can provide the best care to his patients.  I ask every blessing for him.  I ask that you would grant him favor with his employer and help him be successful in his work.  Father, I pray that he will be drawn closer to you all the days of his life. 

Dear Reader:  I would love to hear from you.  Have you ever had someone else's actions cause you fear or anxiety?  Have you thought about forgiving them?  If you’ve already forgiven, what has helped you in that process?  I hope you will share your forgiveness journey via email or in the comments below.  Blessings.

***You can read more on this forgiveness journey at in my article, "Speak Truth" under the January 2012 archive.

The Ultimate Cone Head:  This is not an MRI - but, hey, MRI Designers, check this out!

Too Small to Forgive?

Rebel without a…Helmet
Thursday, October 13, 2011
2:54 PM

Lord, help me forgive the girl on the trail last night, who must have thought I said "move to the left" when I said, "passing on the left." She apparently couldn't hear me with a cell phone plugged into her head.  We came dangerously close to a full on collision with both of us crowding off to the left side of the trail in the same instant.  Lord, Thank you for the buffering angel wings that kept us from a major collision.   I so would have been regretting my no-helmet ride.  I guess I am just a rebel without a...helmet!  What is the reason for that?  I grew up riding bikes without a helmet and don't really see the need—but you'd think a close call like that would give me pause.  And yet I sit here and think—nah.   Do I need to re-think that decision?  I've been riding bikes for over 40 years without a head injury…sounds pretty cocky.  Do I really want to tempt fate?  As a Christian, do I believe in fate?  Or is it that I am making excessive demands on my guardian angel by not wearing a helmet!?  I read a story in the news today where a little guy had his head accidentally run over by a pick-up truck.  He's fine thanks to his…Bike Helmet.  Now. That. Makes. Me. Think.

So Lord, after that little mini-rant and helmet decision tree , I am hearing my annoyance (low level anger) and especially my judgment of this maybe 20 yr old girl.  I think I am judging so harshly because I am fearful of the potential consequences in her lack of attention.  Lord, I know she was truly sorry just from the expression on her face when I passed by.  (The picture in my head is one of passing "through" her - it was that close!) 

Lord, I am offended because her inattention nearly caused me bodily harm.  My hope was that she would know the "rules of the road" and automatically stay on the right.  My hope was that she would be paying attention (not on the phone) so she would hear what I said. 

Father, forgive ME for judging her for her lack of wisdom.  I do choose right now, today, to forgive her and I trust you to complete the supernatural work of forgiveness in me.

Father, I pray for my fellow trail blazer, that she will be safe on the trail in the future.

Who offended:
Fellow Trail blazer
Thinking this is too small an issue to need to forgive?
Fear for the bodily harm she almost caused.

My response:
I judged her for not knowing the correct response to being passed. 
I judged her for using a cell phone on the trail and not paying attention.
Thinking I don't need to forgive since she was in the wrong.
My Heart/Desire:
- She would follow the "rules of the road" and stay on the right so I could pass safely on the left.
 - She would pay attention to her surroundings and not be distracted with a cell phone.
Thank You Lord that you protected us both from a painful crash!
Choose to Forgive:
I do choose to forgive, right now, Lord.  I trust you  to complete the supernatural work of forgiveness in me. 
Forgive Me: 
Lord, forgive me for my response of judgment against this young woman. 
Lord, I release her and her lack of wisdom to you.  I ask for wisdom for her future walks on the trail.  And I take this opportunity of crossing paths with her to pray for her eternal life: that she will know you and love you and we will cross paths again (safely)  in heaven!  Amen